Wayfinders Room #003 - Living in the "Era of Shoulds"

We are living in the “Era of Shoulds”, a time when we are constantly surrounded by how-to’s and expert advice from professionals in every field. Social media became, for many professionals, a way to share their professional and personal opinions, which is fine in many ways, but have you thought about how much it can influence our decisions?

• How to behave properly in a job interview.

• How to be a better worker.

• How to achieve success in your career.

So, if everything that represents success, victory, or achievement has guidelines for how to get it, is there space for important words like integrity, authenticity, or even consistency?

Here’s a personal example: I took the risk of starting a new life from scratch here in Canada. I consider myself mature enough to guide my own life the way I want to. I know how to say no, especially when three out of three company owners I worked for decided it was okay to be disrespectful and act aggressively toward me.

If I were to follow the tips and how-to’s I see every day, I should probably toughen up in hard times, stay quiet even when clearly disrespected, and do what I am told at all times. Well, no!

What about the integrity of my values? What about my authenticity in speaking my mind? What about the consistency of maintaining a sense of respect for others? I quit those companies and clearly expressed why. Best decision.

My concern (and the reason I am writing today) is about this sea of very interesting “shoulds” and “musts” that can easily ruin someone’s life, bringing anxiety, depression, and burnout into everyday routines. I studied arts, I mastered it in my own ways, and I developed lots of soft skills. What about those who have not had the chance to do so yet?

So, here is a thought: how can we be more mindful of the content we share, and of how the ones that are out there influence your perception of work?